Limericks!!

needless to say..

the limerick's callous and crude
its morals distressingly lewd;
it's not worth the reading
by persons of breeding -
it's designed for us vulgar and rude.

haha.. here we go!

some amateur players, most brave
a performance of Hamlet once gave
said a wag "now let's see"
if it's Bacon or he -
I mean Shakespeare - who's turned in his grave.

as a beauty,im not a star
there are many more handsome by far
but my face, i don't mind it,
for i am behind it,
it's the people in front get the jar.

there was an old man of Peru
who dreamt he was eating his shoe.
he woke in the night
in a terrible fright
and found it was perfectly true.

there was a tiresome young man in Bay Shore
when his fiancee cried, 'i adore
the beautiful sea!'
he replied, 'i agree
it's pretty. but what is it for?'

god it's killing me. ^^

there was an old spinster from Fife
who had never been kissed in her life;
along came a cat
and she said "i'll kiss that"
but the cat meowed, 'not on your life!'

^^